Parenting is Hard

Things that make parenting an autistic child hard:

1. Professionals who refer your child to harmful therapies and services when you don’t know any better.
• Therapies such as ABA have been known to cause serious problems including trauma in the autistic population.
• https://sociallyanxiousadvocate.wordpress.com/2015/05/22/why-i-left-aba/
• https://autismwomensnetwork.org/my-thoughts-on-aba/
• http://unstrangemind.com/aba/
2. Professionals who shame you and your child due to their inability to perform the tasks the professionals predetermined are important, even when they are not.
• Telling you that your child needs more socialization – what if I told you that your child’s socialization will work itself out? That they do social differently? Do we socialize our neurotypical children? No, we do not. And thus this is just another “your child is acting not like the others so fix them” tactic.
• Telling you that your child must “use their words.” This is unnecessary. Children can be taught to communicate with technology and other means. Forcing language via spoken word is abuse when a child is not ready to do this yet. Autistic neurological wiring is different.
• Telling you that your child must make eye contact. This is flat out BS. More so it’s just a cultural preference. There is no need for it. It is painful for autistic people. Do not let them force your child in this way anymore than you would let them force your child into bending over backwards, literally.
3. Schools that refuse to accommodate your child’s differences or recognize your child’s strengths.
• This might be the #1 reason most families struggle – the schools systems who routinely abuse autistic children because they do not accommodate or even recognize needs. They punish and force children into terrible predicaments that are almost always detrimental to their well being.
4. Communities that refuse to include your child unless they can pass for “not disabled.”
• How many times have you neglected to go to that movie because it’s too loud and there are no other options?
• How many times have you been left off the birthday invite list because of ignorance?
• How many times have you been given looks six ways 'til Sunday because of ignorance?
5. All of the terrible misinformation that lives on the internet about autism and its causes.
• From deadly miracle cures to fraudulent causes, the snake oil salespeople are out to take your money and your soul along with it.
6. Organizations that profit from fear campaigns that exploit your child’s struggles due to all the above.
• Autism$peaks is among one of the biggest problems that autistic people face. Several other large organizations are not far behind.
• The adult autism population all but goes into hiding April 1 every year because it is the month where Awareness campaigns come out to label them as broken.

All of these things are due to others who exploit the disabled or refuse to educate themselves about autism. None of these things are due to autism. None of these things are due to your child. Keep the blame where it belongs.